On the second day on board the Karanene...

Kyriadra, otherwise known as The Rape-Me-Now Chick, swung down the ladder into the small, smelly hole. Hold. Whatever. Flipping her luscious, thick black hair, she gazed at everyone in turn and said "I have an idea!"

Sparkle-Me-Elmo, aka Devon, Grinned Perfectly, and said "Yes, Ria, honey?"

Ria held out her hands. "We’re a team now, right?" she said to everyone.

Devon raised her eyebrow. "Right..."

"We need a Team Name!!"

Damia, alias Punk-Fairy, hurried over to Kyriadra. "Wow, bitch! That’s such a great idea, whore!"

Devon peered over at the cute little fairy. "Since when did you use such profanities?"

Damia blinked, nonplussed. "What the hell are you talking about, skank?"

Devon growled, "Don’t call me a skank!" Then she frowned thoughtfully. "Although, I might work a brothel if I had too...you know...to put bread on the table...or you know...take care of myself..."

Cal-Han, or more appropriately, Jerome’s-Sex-Pot, bounced in. "Devon in a brothel...how sexy is that!!"

"Shut up, Cal-Han." said Devon, like a man.

"Yes, Sir." Cal-Han replied meekly.

Meanwhile, Kyriadra was waving her hands madly. "Hello?! Pay attention to ME, please!!"

"Oh, yeah...sorry, fuck-brain."

"Sorry..."

"I love you Devon..."

"Shut UP, Cal-Han."

Kyriadra shook her head and continued. "We’re a team now!" Kyriadra posed. "We’re going to right wrongs and triumph over evil!!!!!"

"And that means who?!" Devon asked.

"The King of Tyball of course." replied Kyriadra. Then, in a conspiring whisper, she added, "Your faaaaather..."

At this point, Doku, also known as Me-No-Speak-A-English, snorted out of her restful sleep. "Guh?" she mumbled, looking up questioningly at her hole-mates. Hold-mates. Whatever.

"We’re trying to come up with a Team Name!" Kyriadra said to Doku brightly. "Can you help?"

Doku blinked twice. "Me try my hard-esque." She gave the group a thumbs-up.

Devon thought. A light-bulb flashed over her head. "MAGIC: THE GATHERING!!!!"

Doku winced. "Sparkle-Me-Elmo reaches new Lame level."

Damia nodded. "Word."

Kyriadra frowned. "Isn’t that a...card game?"

Suddenly, Elira (Fight-Club-Bouncer-Lady) saunters in casually, tossing her hair and clawing her claws. "Did someone mention cards?"

Kyriadra waved. "Hi Elira! We’re thinking of a Team Name! Want to help?"

"...how am I a part of this at all?" Elira asked, sceptically.

"It’s in the proooophecy....." said Devon mysteriously.

"What PROPHECY?!" Doku yelled. "There is no prophecy!"

"But Elira will be with us eventually!" Devon whined.

"Not if I can help it..." Elira winced.

Kyriadra cleared her throat. "HELLO! Digressing! Team name!"

Devon raised her hand.

"You may speak, Cult-Member Devon."

"Are we really a Cult?" Doku asked.

"We COULD be a Cult, bitch."

"Ok!"

Kyriadra waved her arms madly. "Team name! Devon! Speak!"

Devon grinned. "Let’s do like...free association..."

"Ok..."

Devon started. "Magic...gathering...thread gathering...The Magic Thread!"

"...NO!"

Damia continued. "Thread...weaving...the tapestry of weaving..Woven Tapestry, bitch!"

"...NO!"

Ria tried. "Woven...together...group...five...group of five..."

Devon snapped. "ROOT 25!!!!!!!!!!!! ROOT 25!!!!!!! GENIUS!!!!!!!!!"

Silence ensued.

Doku shook her head. "Teh Suck is Devon. Besides, these names wouldn’t sell."

"Well?" Damia asked. "What WOULD sell, pimp?"

"......"

".........."

"....."

"FIVE SLUTS AND A BABY!!!!" yelled Kyriadra, bouncing up and down.

"Where the hell does the baby come from?!" asked Doku.

"...I thought you didn’t speak English."

"Whoops. Aah...whatever."

"The baby will be mine!" screamed Devon. She then added in a dramatic whisper, "but Cal-Han won’t be the father...dun dun dun!!!"

Cal-Han scratched his head. "I was supposed to be the father?" Cal-Han gasped. "DEVON! ARE WE GETTING SERIOUS?!"

Devon rolled her eyes. "No way, buck-o. I know all about you and Jerome. I SAW you in that shower..."

Cal-Han blushed a deep red. "N-no," he stammered. "Y-you don’t understand. He MADE me...I didn’t...enjoy it or anything...h-honest."

"You’re a terrible liar."

Kyriadra shook her head at Devon. "Don’t be so mean." Then she added, whispering, "He’s your broooother....."

"What?!"

"Nothing."

"Ah!" cried Doku. "Nor Has Being!"

The group looked over. "What was that, Doku?"

"Nor Has Being!"

Kyriadra frowned. "Um...what does that MEAN, exactly?"

Doku looked back at her and shrugged. "Dunno. Me no speak good English."

Kyriadra wrung her hands. "But we need a Group Name! Otherwise, how are we supposed to compete with The Sailor Scouts, The Fantastic Four, or The Backstreet Boys?"

"OH!!!" cried Devon. "B-4-6!! After-5!!!"

—Devon has Officially reached a New High of Lame—

"Elira!" cried Kyriadra desperately. "Help us, please!"

"No. I choose not to get involved. Morons." And with that, Elira turned back to her other hole-mates. Hold-mates. Whatever.

Damia crawled over to where Ria and Doku sat. "We need a name really fast, bints, or Devon will...make it something...scary..."

"KYRIADRA AND THE BLOWFISH!!!!"

"Who are the BLOWFISH?!"

"ARE YOU CALLING ME A BLOWFISH?!?!?!?!"

"CAL-HAN AND THE HAREM!!!"

"Heey..." said Cal-Han. "I LIKE that one..."

"SHUT UP, Cal-Han!!" And with that, the five girls threw Cal-Han off the Karanene.

The End